Almost a year later….

Well its almost been a year since Chrissy left me. Not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought about her. She is always on my mind. It definitely doesn’t help every morning when I check Facebook and the “On this day” part pops up. Everyday has something to do with her. I’ve never felt this way for so long after losing them. I can honestly say that I’m still in love with her, no matter how I try to make myself think otherwise.

Why her? Why am I still having feelings for her? Is it because I messed up this time? Or, is this me heart saying, this love was real.

There are many people who say there is that one person out there for us. Our soulmate. Does this mean she could be mine? Or have I fallen in love with someone so much more than I have with anyone else? Or was it even love with all the others? I guess you could say maybe I had lust and love mixed up.

With Chrissy, its different. I sit here, right now, with my heart still waiting for her. I’ve never wanted anyone back so much in my life. I’ve tried moving on to other women. But I just can’t. Everything about it feels wrong. Is there anything I can do? Do I continue to wait on my life for someone that may or may not come back? Or is it even an option considering its a year later? So many questions and not enough answers. After all, my heart only wants the answer to the question, is she going to come back to me?

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